It's beginning to look a lot like F**k this...we mean Christmas.
So, just for you, we've put together a collection of xxx-rated Christmas gifts to slip into someone's Xmas stocking this festive season.
From crude decorations to rude cards. From sweary jewellery to sexy sweatshirts. From wacky wall art to willy socks.
Straight from our secret workshop, this selection of glorious goodies is guaranteed to stand out from all the other last-minute festive crap that people order on Amazon.
There's no fast fashion here. Just timeless presents that you just might decide to keep for yourself.
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The highest price is <span class=money>£29.99</span>